In my last post I told you about one of the hardest times for me. While that is important to tell you, especially if you're thinking about beginning a similar journey, it's also important to tell you the good things. There is a lot more good than bad so I'm not sure where to start. Hmmm maybe with the night I was going to join hubby and his girlfriend. That was when my world would again change forever.
I was so nervous about joining them! I am bisexual but it had been more than a decade since I'd been intimate with a woman. Maybe it's like riding a bike...once you learn you never forget? Holy crap...I never did learn how to ride a book. What was I going to do? How was I supposed to feel? This was not what my mind and emotions had geared up for. I was still trying to get used to the idea of my husband being intimate with another woman. I was not ready for all of this. Someone stop the train!!! I'm going to sit this ride out, maybe I'll get on the next train to ride.
It felt like I was cheating on him when I touched her. My monogamous mindset couldn't fully accept that I was...that I had done something sexual with a person who wasn't my husband. On top of that I also had feelings for this lovely lady I was spending so much time with. I was beginning to be able to see myself spending a lifetime loving her just as much as I do my husband.
He and I talked in great length about my feelings, my confusion, where my head was at. Being the absolutely amazing wonderful man that he is he told me all of my feelings were OK. He reassured me I had not cheated on him. He was happy for me that I was starting to love her. Just like I was happy for him that he loved her. So onward we move to the next chapter...
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